Poor Thanksgiving.
You don't even have an aisle at Target. It goes Halloween, Halloween, Halloween, CHRISTMAS!
"But Patria, I'm not a materialistic holiday!"
"But Thanksgiving, no one is even thinking about you."
"What about the food?"
Oh yes, Thanksgiving. My pinterest walls are exploding with ideas of foods that could be possibly used for you. But they aren't "Thanksgiving" recipes anyhow, they're all "Fall" "Harvest" "Pumpkin Spice" "Chai Latte" recipes. And don't you want to be known for more than gluttony anyhow?
"Visiting with family!"
Oh yes, Thanksgiving. People in cramped cars, stuck in traffic for hours, yelling at each other, fights at the dinner table between family members who think differently, delayed flights...
"There's football!"
Oh yes, Thanksgiving. Because grown men crashing into eachother in pig piles, and families fighting over which team is better is a good thing. Let's drink beer and scream, like we do every Saturday, Sunday and Monday in Fall.
"The Parade!"
Oh yes, Thanksgiving. Consumerism at its best - with bright colors and lip-synching Disney Channel Stars. And if you even mention that dog show competition....
"Black Friday"
Oh, sweet, sweet lil' Thanksgiving, that has nothing to even do with you. That's all about your big impressive older brother, Christmas, and his big older brother, Materialism! Is that all you got?
"The Pilgrims!"
Does anyone even think about the Pilgrims anymore? Aside from kids in second grade pageants, most people decide to not even include this part in their celebrations. It's 'questionable' about its political correctness, you see, and what do those people have to do with us really? History doesn't matter.
"Well what about my name?"
"Your name?"
"My name. Thanks. Giving."
"Gee Thanksgiving, is the day even about your name anymore?"
....
"I like to think it could be."
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