Yeah, but like, what do you ACTUALLY do?

"So Patria, what do you do?"
"Well, I'm a costume designer for theater and film..".

Pick a response:

A) Oh cool, so, do you make your own clothes?
B) Thats neat, are you going to make your own wedding dress?
C) AWESOME! Halloween is coming up in a month!

Honestly, I've been a little frustrated these past few weeks, and I've pinpointed one of the sources of my frustration to this seemingly innocent dialogue. I don't know about you, but as a general rule, when I tell someone something as meaningful as my beloved career path, I want to be taken seriously. Instead, it would seem that the majority of people envision my life as a Quilting Bee episode of Little House on the Prairie.... but with more sequins!

Obviously, I disagree with the "little mice helping Cinderella build her dress" theory. Maybe I once thought the same thing when I started out on this path, but seeing as I've been working continuously in professional costume shops since the age of 15, I seem to have forgotten that vision if I did indeed ever have it.

So, let's clear the air! Sit back, and allow me to explain. What is a professional costumer? Well, to sum it all in one word... BADASS.

Whether you are a designer, technician, wardrobe, craftsperson, illustrator, or any combination thereof, working in entertainment costuming takes a whole lot of chutzpah. Hours are long (typically upward of 40, possibly above 60, or even higher, in the last weeks before opening), you are most likely underpaid (I  once made a grave error and calculated how much I "made" for one "paid" shop internship... pennies on the hour. I'm not even going to think about the uncompensated ones), and incredibly stressed!

Our skillset is an eclectic one. Not only do you have to be able to make a shirt "look like it has had multiple caramel macchiatos spilled on it before being mauled by a bear" but you also have to be able to account for 100 costumes for 20+ cast members, including jewelry, hankies, gloves, socks, lingerie, hats, and keep a total piece count (476).

• Budgetry, Scheduling, Organization - paperwork plays a huge role in our jobs, and can be a key factor in getting you hired more than once.
  
• Sketching, rendering, swatching - being able to visually convey a concept, a newly birthed idea, to a director who cannot see inside your brain. Ever try to describe a piece of artwork? Really, reallllly describe it - the feelings it gives you, the context of when it was created, the artist's emotional state? Yeah, see how easy that is?
  
• Research and development - personally, research is my favorite part. Figuring out how a dress would've been built in a time period from which no extant pieces remain.... and then how to make it yourself! What sort of fabrics would've been used? How were the fibers processed?
  
• Sewing. If you can't build it, you can't put it onstage. If you can't build it properly, you will regret putting it onstage.  If you can't fix it, you will get impromptu nudity onstage. Impromptu nudity onstage will get you boos from your employers, cheers from the audience. Too bad the audience doesn't pay your next month's rent.
  
• Creative problem solving -- "She needs to change from a man's three piece suit, hat and shoes, into a skimpy, floor-length negligee.... in 10 seconds." "So, can one of his feet be a club foot?" "The mermaids should be able to perform in a kick line". 
  
• Time management (and stress management) -- If you are charged with building a 1930s 27 person musical set in the winter, and you have three weeks and two stitchers, next to no budget, and its the middle of July (I'm lookin' at you, Lil' Summer Stock Annie), and you accept that mission, you better deliver. And the only way you can do that is through the most careful planning and utilization of zen breathing. And possibly only enough sleep to keep yourself functioning above zombie level. It's not recommended for the faint of spirit.
  
• Dyeing, Distressing, Beading, Welding, Weaving, Tatting, Spinning, Burnishing, Painting, Embroidering, Quilting, Smithing, Enameling... this list can go on and on. Every show or project I work on, I learn something new. It never gets boring - there is always something to be learned, some challenge to overcome. It is an uphill battle, and I love every second of it. Everyone who has ever worked in costumes can add something I have missed to this list.

So the next time you think about comparing a costumer's profession to an episode of Project Runway or My Great Big DIY Wedding, you might want to reconsider. We may know how to smile and look pretty, but behind every costumer's battle armor hewn from red lipstick or a brown furry vest, there is a whole mess of calculated, precise, knowledgeable, stormforce energy. Don't challenge us to unleash that whirlwind -- anyone who can create a career simply out of PASSIONATE LOVE FOR WHAT THEY DO truly is a force to be reckoned with.